Inspired by Dennis Ritchie, here is a list of people who I am not:

• Rich Lafferty, champion enduro motorcycle racer, who gives me the best run for my money in Google (although I now have the #1 result for “rich lafferty motorcycle” which amuses me)
• Richard Lafferty, Métis fiddler in the Northwest Territories
• Richard Lafferty, Montreal investment analyst who compared Jacques Parizeau to Hitler and caused my answering machine to fill up for about a week because I was the only “Rich Lafferty” in the Montreal phone book
• Richard Lafferty, owner of a truly giant RV
• Richard Lafferty, former Connecticut lawyer
• Richard T. Lafferty, past president of the American Institute of Architects
• Richard Lafferty, bank lawyer, who I list here primarily because his middle initial is “Q”
• Richard Lafferty, Irish taxi driver, who looks as typically Irish as my father, which is probably the same direction I’m heading in
• Richard Lafferty, decedent (and Richard Lafferty, his son!)